Easing back-to-school anxiety
Parents may spend more time thinking about back-to-school clothes than they do about helping children prepare emotionally for returning to the classroom.
What’s more, anxiety in children may not look the same as it does in adults, so a quick primer can make parents’ jobs easier.
Emily Stone, PNP, a pediatric nurse practitioner with Seaside Pediatrics shared helpful ways for children to make the emotional transition from summer vacation to full-time student easier. She began by saying that parents and adults don’t realize anxiety is manifested differently in kids than adults.
“Stomachaches, headaches, not sleeping well or more tantrums can all be signs that your child has increased anxiety,” she said. “Recognizing anxiety can be helpful. It’s the first step toward dealing with it.”
Stone said she has seen more school avoidance since the COVID-19 pandemic began. Some students just refuse to go to school, she said, and you should not reward a child for staying home. Instead, find out what’s behind school avoidance that needs to be addressed, such as what’s making them afraid to go to school. It may not always be easy to find out, but a team approach with the teacher, parents and even healthcare professionals involved can uncover answers and lead to solutions, she said.
Stone offered these tips to help ease basic back-to-school anxiety:
- Become familiar with the school. If the first day of school is not the first time they are seeing the school, that can help allay fears. “A lot of kids get nervous going to an unfamiliar place, so try to visit the school, even if you just go to the outside of the building and use the playground.”
- Make connections. “If you know who your teacher will be, make a few connections with other kids who will have the same teacher. Setting up a playdate with a future classmate can ease anxiety. It’s helpful for kids to know someone in their class,” she said.
- Prepare for the school routine. Summer schedules often mean waking up late and going to bed late. It’s wise to get prepared for the weeknight school routine to help make sure kids are getting enough sleep. “Lack of sleep can ignite stress and anxiety,” she pointed out. “An overly tired kid is usually not a flexible, easy-going kid, so help your children transition into a good school schedule.”
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Be validating, not dismissive. Many parents dismiss children who, for example, say they are scared. If you’ve heard yourself say, “Oh, it’s not scary. You’re fine,” that’s being dismissive.
Instead, Stone said parents should validate children’s feelings. Say, “Yes, it can be scary to change your routine, but it can be easy and will become fun. School will become fun.”
Validating their feelings instead of dismissing them will make them feel better about expressing themselves. “What’s scary to kids isn’t necessarily scary to you, so encourage kids to express themselves and be comfortable sharing their feelings with you.”
- Know when to seek help. If after a month or so kids still aren’t comfortable going to school and you aren’t having success easing their anxiety, then it’s time to see your pediatrician, Stone said, adding, “It’s better to address anxieties earlier than later.”
In a recent Youth Mental Health Advisory, the U.S. Surgeon General said, “Mental health conditions are real, common, and treatable. People experiencing mental health challenges deserve support, compassion, and care—not stigma and shame.”
Focusing on youth mental health now is critical. Your local healthcare professionals are ready to help. These online resources are also available in formats kids may enjoy:
- YouTube videos for Youth and Teens, like calming your mind and finding things to do that make you happy.
- Parents can start here for tools to help with younger children.
